Congratulations to Our Back-to-back Corenament Champions Minna no Kodomo-chan; Woe Be unto Those Sinister Forces Arrayed Against Them

From the Galaxy Note of Wilton P. Prescott Jr.

April 8, 2019

I’m still wrestling with what I just witnessed. I’ve been to every Corenament final since the inception — saw Kamen Joshi’s loaded audience in ’16, the BiSH-Babymetal staredown in ’17, Minna no Kodomo-chan’s supernaturally aided victory last year — and never once have I felt as awed, in the presence of greatness, as I do at this moment.

Like every year, I came for NECRONOMIDOL. Like every year, I watched them bow out early.

Like every year, I thought that PassCode might break through. Like every year, they were dropped by a lesser name.

Like every year, I had money riding on the outcome. I put it on YONEKO after her big second-round upset. Like every year, I leave the Corenament final a little bit poorer.

Like every year, I came because I expected to see greatness emerge. And this year, I finally truly saw it.

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A Year This Chaotic Deserves a Corenament Final This Unexpected

Well dang, you guys. Tell me if you saw this coming: Minna no Kodomo-chan not only making a return to the Corenament final, but absolute dismantling every opponent foolish enough to step into their path along the way; opposite them, the little weirdo that could, a giantslayer if ever there was one in this event, former dog bite victim and Homicidols Dot Com interview subject YONEKO. I usually have a low-key private rooting interest when we do these things (and am often disappoint!), but this time I find myself in the position of an over-proud parent. Hell, I’ve been that way through the entire Final Four!

This one’s for all the marbles*, gang. A culmination of victories large and small can only be a perfect synthesis. New-school loud idols against an established performer doing new things, the defending champs against a sentimental upstart. It’s poetry, I tell you. Now let’s settle it for good and all: Continue reading

The Corenament Final Four Has Arrived. Hold on to Your Butts.

Well, team, we made it. As promised, today begins the Final Four, and what a final four it is — favorites and underdogs and dark horses and other metaphors all meeting to decide who this year’s Corenament champion will be. And we haven’t even had any fanfic yet! Amazing. We truly do live in wild times.

The bracket, as it now stands:

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The 2019 Homicidols Corenament Elite Eight Is Great, So Let’s Cut That in Half

Dang, you guys, this year’s Corenament — sans the usual convoluted rules, sudden twists and manipulative attempts to drag things out — has tons of cool turns anyway. I like it!

Yesterday, we wrapped up the Sweet Sixteen (parts 1 and 2). I was out watching some of the regular men’s tournament and not-enjoying having all sense of goodness and right trod upon several times in quick succession. It was rough! But not as rough as seeing quite a few personal favorites get eliminated from this annual extravaganza.

Today begins our Elite Eight, to run through tomorrow before next weekend’s big Final Four showdown. This is no tricks, no frills, just straight-up MV vs. MV battles for supremacy and the coveted championship belt fanfic post. Oh, and being treated like royalty by editorial policy, too, I guess. Continue reading

The 2019 Homicidols Corenament Sweet Sixteen, Part the Second

Holy crap, you guys, yesterday’s Sweet Sixteen first half was awesome! Zenkimi won out after a furious (if by “furious” I mean “six hours long”) comeback, BiSH narrowly pulled out a tight one against JyuJyu … and YONEKO was the day’s Upset Special, humiliating BBTS after a back-and-forth battle. It was so wild that Minna no Kodomo-chan drowning NaNoMoRaL in a bathtub (metaphorically!) was actually the most shocking result, and it shouldn’t have been, because these things get seeded the way they do for a reason, kids.

Anyway, the bracket now looks like:

And today’s Sweet Sixteen second half is going to be an absolute bloodbath! Continue reading

The 2019 Homicidols Corenament Sweet Sixteen, Part the First

Welcome back, friends, to the 2019 Homicidols Corenament! Last week’s opening round of 32 was … well, it had some interesting results. You can check out the first go and the second, plus overtime in what would have been the biggest upset in Corenament history had not somebody stuffed the ballot box Kaqriyo Terror Architect hit their buzzer-beater and advanced. Ah, March Madness!

The bracket:

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Extra Corenament Overtime Time!

You guys, something completely unprecedented has happened: It’s normal for two contestants for the Corenament title to be tied at the end of regulation, so overtime is, uh, normal; it’s only happened once before this round that overtime has needed extra overtime, and guess what? At least then a decision was reached and somebody went home in tears!

Nope, for the first time ever, we have two idol groups, having gone toe-to-toe through regulation, OT and then another OT (re: overnight!) have still failed to break their tie. And that means … well, more OT. But structured!

Kaqriyo Terror Architect, last year’s runner-up and an early favorite for this year’s title, is at risk of pulling a Virginia and falling to the lowest seed in the event, DAIDAIDAI, who are in the Corenament for the first time but clearly pulling their own amount of fan favoritism. Their incredible energy has proven an equal match for Kaqriyo’s, well, being Kaqriyo! So we need to settle this for once and all.

I’ll take this down at my noontime. Winner advances; loser gets a participation trophy.

And may the gods help us if they’re somehow still tied.

The 2019 Homicidols Corenament, Round 1 Part 2

Wow! We had ourselves one heck of a first half of a first round of the 2019 Homicidols Corenament! (If you’re very confused, start here.) I’ll spare the world the recap for now, but go ahead and say up front anyway: lol @ Babymetal. You’re basically Tennessee!*

Our bracket now looks like this:

And plenty more action to come!

The rest of the round will run starting now until Sunday night / Monday morning / when I remember to close the polls. None of these matchups are deliberate and some I now regret, but so it goes when half of what you do is random and the other half is purely for your own amusement! Continue reading

The 2019 Homicidols Corenament, Round 1

All righty, folks, the Big Dance has finally arrived, and now begins the arduous process of crowning a new Corenament champion for 2019! I very literally cannot believe that this is the fourth iteration of this contest. You’d think that we’d have better things to do!

If you need background, go read the primer. If you need assistance, friend, there isn’t any. All I can say at this point is that Sister Jean’s promise to Hanako-san from last year is still unrealized, and that there’s still plenty of lingering, simmering resentment not just from last year’s outcome, but come the shocking conclusion to Queen of the Scene as well. Milcboy will not be denied!

Here’s your big board:

How are we competing? Music videos! Which ones? IT’S COMPLETELY RANDOM! If you’re at all familiar with the NCAA Tournament, you know very well how random performance can be from one game to another — to win the thing, not only do you need to be able to play your best for six straight games over three weeks, but at a level that’s at least one score better than your opponent in every one of those games. Slip up a little bit, try to relax, not take your opponent seriously, happen to have a bad game, happen to have an opponent who’s a terrible matchup for you? See you next year, chump! Continue reading

Your 2019 Homicidols Corenament Primer

People love to bang on about traditions and rites and whatnot. It’s fine! I happen to dig on a little bit of nostalgia myself, especially when I can get invested in some element thereof. And if I invent the thing? Well then sure, I’ll care even extra!

So: Ah, friends, is there any finer tradition in sports, any finer rite of spring than the Corenament? For those uninitiated into its mysteries, the Corenament is an annual competition, spiritually akin to the famed NCAA basketball tournament, but realistically absolutely nothing like it except for a cheap branding opportunity! We set a bracket, we populate it with idols, and we vote, ever so many times over a few weeks, until we have a champion. In order, past champs are Kamen Joshi, Babymetal and Minna no Kodomo-chan. It’s an excuse to fanfic. Good times had by most!

We’ll kick things off on Thursday, which is the day when the real tournament games begin, as opposed to like right now, which is when the NCAA starts things with their convoluted extended field. In fact, we’re going to make things simpler this year than in the past by having a smaller field for once, and by emphasizing real things to compete head-to-head with, and by adding the kinds of random variables that populate IRL sporting events but are usually minimized in a controlled environment like online polls and stuff.

Anyway, your field is: Continue reading