PassCode Answers the Question You’ve All Been Asking: What Would Bring Me The Horizon Sound Like If Covered by Idols?

Well of all the things that I definitely didn’t expect to run into yesterday, but did anyway, I think you can chalk up “PassCode covering a big-ass deal Western band and releasing a very Western-friendly MV to go along with it” as not only the winner, but also the closest I came to actually snorting coffee all over my keyboard since Covid-san chased me back to Maniac Mansion for work. Good job, PassCode! And also: Good job, PassCode! Your cover of “MANTRA” is right the hell on!

Original, for reference

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Let’s Discover Some Idols: INUWASI

So I’m drifting through idol media these days like a half-aware drunk, and let me tell you, friends, it’s a weird feeling. I won’t tell on myself so much as to name names here, but I’ll admit to seeing a particular group’s photo, and seeing their name, and being like, wait, I know what that is, wtf is that though? And then I looked and I’d written like 10 posts about them. Never do a hiatus, I guess is the rule here.

Anyway, lots of new/ish groups out there, and I figure that I always used to at least try to cover them, so why stop now, and also hey neat there’s also stuff that’s almost a year old that I never got to before! THE POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS.

Which brings me to INUWASI (Twitter), who I got to by slipping and falling off of a NEMURIORCA tweet and seeing a completely different idol set when I came to. But yes, they’re also part of the Maple.Inc family, and so have more than passing similarities to MAPLEZ and etc., and oh no they debuted in like February. Oh that’s awful. Cheese and rice, can you imagine? You’re up there idoling your ass off and there’s like only 10% of the usual sweaty wota dancing in surgical masks as there’d usually be? Terrible. And then everything gets canceled or moved online? Woof.

At the time of my discovery, not-ol’ INUWASI had a couple of live clips to enjoy. I use the verb conditionally, as “different strokes for different folks” for sure applies here. Let’s start with the better of the two:

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Their Latest Single Is Proof that ayumikurikamaki Were Replaced by Doppelgangers Who You Can Only Tell Aren’t Real by Noticing How They Didn’t Have Enough Fun Programmed into Them

Yeesh, you guys. So despite the perhaps apparent statements to the contrary, I actually listened to a good bit of idol during my hiatus — I just didn’t have the energy or wherewithal to do anything with it, which sucked! But yeah, plenty of listening, and I’ll eventually get around to musing about much more of it as a way of making it seem like I’m not a completely lazy jerk. Today, though, I’m only going to bring up my single most disappointing idol release of the year, and in fact maybe in the last several. Is it the worst? Didn’t say that! Is it bad? That’s subjective, player! But, like, pick for yourself synonyms of “disappointing” and “boring” and “uninspired” and “cash-grab” and you’ll be all set to fill out the Mad-Lib that you’re using to review ayumikurikamaki’s latest single, “”, because that’s all the level of care and concern it deserves. Continue reading

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Let’s Discover Some Idols: TENRIN

It’s comforting to know that idol didn’t miss me one bit; nothing speaks to one’s insignificance as a person quite like realizing that the thing you put a lot of time into can and will endlessly go about its business even if you spontaneously burst into flame and disappear. And I mean it — I’ve been “back” online for like all of a total hour in 2.25 or so days, and I’m already finding out about new groups!

Take TENRIN, who I’m sure have already taken the world by storm and have a Discord just for their filthy gaijin fans, but who I stumbled over about 22 minutes ago while looking at Twitter for any last-minute Weekender items:

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Let’s Enjoy POPPING EMO Together

I assume that you all have been enjoying POPPING EMO over the past several months, anyway, but I also assume that all of idol was frozen in carbonite in mid-February and is only now being thawed out, so it’s in fact neither here nor there that this randomly SCRAMBLES-aligned group up and dropped like 20 tracks onto Soundcloud the other day. Right? Like, their Twitter looks fine, albeit short of details. Nothing actually happened, right?

Consider this post an opportunity to get re-acquainted, which you could say may have been my motivation for making it in the first place and not be wrong!

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NEO JAPONISM Is the Reward

Gee whiz, gang, now that I’m alive again, which idol should I write about first? I know! Let’s put the giant-ass index that D built into a tumbler and pull out something at random!

/puts giant-ass index into tumbler
//spins tumbler
Oops!
///tips tumbler over
Oh no, what have I done
////rifles through entered idol names until I find the one I want

What a random coincidence! It looks like I get to write about NEO JAPONISM again! Continue reading

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This Is the Shittiest Thing You’ll See All Day

I don’t want to have to watch it again! So let’s dispense with the incredible urge to pun this thing to death and instead focus on how Watanabe clearly wanted to get back to the magic of “Hoshi ga Matataku Yoru Ni” by taking a hopped-up punk number and literally turning his performers into human toilets. Even the choreography recalls “Hoshi ga”!

Good lord. BiS2’s album is out next Wednesday. May the gods have mercy on us.

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Let’s Meet FaM

Yes, friends, I can apparently keep up with new idols, as was my new year’s resolution on repeat. Such a promise was made in the hopes that 2020 will bring the same kind of greatness that 2018 did, and we’ll all forget that 2019 even happened. Fingers crossed, we’ll at worst feel good about it.

Which brings me to Lesson Number Umpteen on why you should make friends with people in idol! My pal with the old connection to Candye Syrup tipped me off a few days ago that there was a new group debuting soon, with an obvious connection to said defunct group, and then followed up this morning with the first best debut so far this year.

Meet FaM (Twitter), which yes relates to “family.” This was a relief, because upon seeing that I worried that it didn’t have any particular meaning, not even as a clever way of capitalizing a common shorthand greeting/pronoun kind of thing among the youngs in my country. What do they sound like? Continue reading

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Monday’s Worth It When KAQRIYOTERROR Has a Preview for You

I was definitely going to skip idol today, gang. I’m tired and there’s a lot of work to do besides, and the last thing I wanted to see were DMs, because the mere suggestion of DMs means that idol things happened, and I usually want to at least pretend to follow up on them. But what a choice to make to look! There are things! Posting things!

First up today is the latest two-hour (guffaw) preview from the chaos merchants at KAQRIYOTERROR, who will make this official release next Wednesday but right now really want you to listen to “Persona” and talk about it online with #Persona_! Which is likely because there’s all kinds of stuff related to the video game on Twitter right now, a very happy coincidence no doubt. Anyway!

You know what to do. Continue reading

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We Friggin’ Told You That the New YONEKO Single Was Great

It’s highly likely that what I’m sharing with you here is something that you already know, but for the sake of posterity and because we want her to have nice things and not at all because Derek asked nicely, I here am following up on Brian’s lovely review of YONEKO’s excellent new single with the fully fledged real-deal MV for it.

Just, like, definitely go read the review and then come back, fully prepared mentally and physically, for this assault of awesome:

Wait for it …

Why make more of it? The young woman is talented and creative as hell. We love her, you love her — now take this and go make a bunch of other people who’ve never even heard of her before love her, too.

Well, I guess the fact that YONEKO is now officially moving into the post-idol phase of her career (apparently in all projects?), so technically this is the last we’ll post about her in a dedicated way, but that’s nonsense and of course we’ll keep the updates coming, YONEKO occupies a special place for us and it doesn’t matter how or when or why she performs, we’ll be there.

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