I’m so sorry. This is just the dumbest thing ever. Not the video, not even the thing happening, just … I can absolutely see some kind of stunt involving idols and scorpions — like, the actual arthropods with the big claws and stingy tails — and I can’t stop laughing. Ridiculous.

Anyway! Remember that thing about some of Kamen Joshi heading to St. Petersburg for this festival thing? Well, Scorpions were, I think, basically the headliners of the concert stuff, and that led to this:

Thanks as always, PIH!

I was legitimately really holding out for the Mask Girls to take over vocals on any one of Scorpions’ many big-ass songs, but it was not to be. They didn’t even get to do the whistles! Hell, Yuki at the very least is pretty English-capable, they could have invited her to sing a stanza or join the chorus or something.

“Maniac, this is a dumb video,” you’re thinking. And you’re right! Not as stupid as Su-metal dorking it up with the Chilis, but still! But you know what? It’s idols, of some prominence, with a very big Western band, in a country that doesn’t usually cater a whole lot to idols, and that’s good and important and when Coachella randomly adds a handful of idol acts to the bill in the near future, I fully expect to see whoever wind up on stage and dance and maybe sing a little, and it’ll be an important moment because these things validate the whole idea that idols are legit performers, and bless it all that’s why I’m here.

Carry on.