WACK Wins by Having Nothing to Apologize For

All of my reactions to WACK news lately seems to be along the lines of “well, that happened.”

It all started on Friday, with this foreboding billboard atop Shibuya’s famous 109 building:

“We haven’t done anything yet, but we apologize in advance?”

Well, that’s ominous. Granted, I can think of many things WACK should apologize for, but this is now. Well, the future. Eyebrows were raised. Questions were asked. Just what exactly is this future scandal WACK have had to apologize in advance for? It got even worse when Watanabe tweeted out the words many a WACK fan dread; “Announcement at 24:00.” There was panic, theorizing (mostly from me) when eventually, the fateful moment came.

“We’re apologizing for nothing.”

What? Wasn’t that an anticlimactic and confusing announcement.

Specifically, the announcement was that for the next five days or so, WACK members would be on the streets handing out a special free 40-page colour magazine based around the theme of “apologizing in advance.” If you’re lucky, maybe some WACK idols will even apologize to you in person!

Something particularly interesting was that, not only were current members of WACK out and about with their apology-fest, but so were a few mysterious high school girls. Sneak peeks of our future WAggs? Time will tell.

So what, exactly, is inside these mysterious magazines? Apologies. Lots and lots of apologies. Specifically, the theme is “If you were to apologize for something in the near future, what would you apologize for?” And well, everything you’d expect members of WACK (but not Watanabe, of course) to apologize for, from having too many boyfriends (Chitti) to exploiting your virgin hearts (Doku). It sounds like a wild read and a wild time. The list of apologies would be way too long, but I plonked them on the (still under construction, help me!) WACKi for everyone. Huge huge props to owomo on Discord for translating all of this!

In my honest opinion, as much of a confusing mess as this whole apology deal is, I think this is a step in the right direction for WACK. I don’t think any of us were expecting a sincere apology any time soon, and as expected, this apology is obviously nothing more but a silly thing done for attention. But its something fresh, and I like that. How long has it been since there was a notable publicity stunt that wasn’t just recycled from the past? Or made us worried for the well-being of WACK’s idols? This is merely something ridiculous done to get the fans talking and maybe even attract some new ones, nothing more (as of now). And if kanekk0 on Twitter is correct about this being a parody of the many recent Johnnys scandals, then not only is this something new, its something reminiscent of what the old BiS used to do.

I think a lot of us who became WACK fans through that incarnation of BiS have been hoping for that kind of counterculture weirdness to return for a long time. I know I’m not the only one. Sure, it confused me, but it didn’t make me angry or go “why am I still falling for this crap?” Good job, WACK. Keep it up.

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