News Brief: American Music Festival Makes Incredible Mistake

[Baltimore, Md., USA]
Following the announcement that GODFLESH will be replacing My Dying Bride as headliner of the annual extreme metal smorgasbord that is Maryland Deathfest, festival co-founder Ryan Taylor released a follow-up statement.

“Evan [Harting, fellow co-founder] messaged me a few hours after tickets went on sale to let me know that we’d somehow missed out on two up-and-coming Japanese acts. NECRONOMIDOL and Broken By The Scream have been making such huge waves all around the world, and they’re perfect for MDF, and I completely dropped the ball.

“Such an oversight. I mean, we’ve included Melt Banana; what the hell was I thinking.”

When reached for additional comment, the incredibly intelligent MDF coordinator, who is almost as tasteful as he is attractive, said, “The thing is, if I’d known about the sick dual vocals in ‘Love is a maiden’s cry’ or the chilly black bleakness of ‘ITHAQUA’ before, I’d have reached out months and months ago.

“The concept of MDF is simple: to bring to the United States the best and most extreme bands the underground has to offer. MDF is a showcase of what extreme music, both new and old, is capable of. With an emphasis on diversity, the festival brings together the very best death metal, grindcore, doom, thrash, hardcore, black metal, and experimental bands from all around the world. The diversity of the lineup is only surpassed by the diversity of MDF’s rabid fan base.

“Unfortunately, this year’s lineup is set, so NECRONOMIDOL and Broken By The Scream will just have to wait until 2019. And what’s this about a Hanako-san?”

Harting, who could previously be heard bellowing his drunken sorrow in the background, jumped onto the line. “HOMICIDOLS WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”, apparently referencing Homicidols.com, the additionally apparent source of his learning of NECRONOMIDOL and Broken By The Scream.

Representatives of NECRONOMIDOL and Broken By The Scream could not be reached for comment by press time.

Reading Lolisyn: Cautiously Optimistic

Caveat: The original title of this post was “Oh, for Fuck’s Sake”, so be thankful that a few minutes’ worth of messing around before writing got me to dial it back a bit

Say, remember Lolisyn? Like, in their way one of the early chika icons? That was terribly, inexplicably disbanded completely out of the blue, and had a final live for the ages? And then was announced as 564 REBOOT barely a month later, with a lineup that could have been described as an underground all-star team? And that immediately lost one of its key members? And then did a tiny handful of lives before the usual idol group troubles got the whole thing canceled before most people had a chance to even get used to its existence, which would have been difficult even on an infinite timeline because they almost never performed?

Well, it’s happening again.

Continue reading

Oshi Digest #26: Deliverance

Oshi did not summon this week. All is nonetheless well. Her orders were clear. Our path is clear.

Step 1: Necroma will be back in the UK in June:

Prepare. Continue reading

Let’s Remember Some Idols! DEEP GIRL

The other day, when I was re-re-listening to Shiori’s banger of a comeback, I was too busy typing to catch the end of the video before it auto-played something else. And as dulcet tones poured from my computer speakers, I thought:

“HOLY SHIT YES REMEMBER THIS!”

See, a lot of you guys are relative newcomers, and stuff that happened and was like immediately topical and relevant two years ago may as well be ancient history. Such is idol, in fact. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t enjoy some real past classics, idols who flickered into the world, crushed some damn skulls, and then were whisked from existence by the cruelties of fate and expiring contractual obligations.

You may be aware / have noticed that that I like to style the editorial here around how the old Gawker sites used to — a little irreverent, a little smart, a little snarky — and Deadspin happens to be my long-time favorite of the lot. They periodically do a feature called “Let’s Remember Some Guys”, which focuses on long-gone athletes who people really enjoyed for one reason or another.

I see no reason to not Remember Some Idols. First up! Continue reading

Oshi Digest #25: Communion

Do you understand how hard it was to not share Oshi’s glory over the last couple of days. I promised myself, you’ll do Oshi Digest on Sunday … and then there was no chance; ditto Monday. And now, here we are, and I have a tale!

A few days ago, a mystery occurrence:

Where was Oshi? While the official explanation on her behalf was that she was feeling unwell, the reality is far darker. Continue reading

Oshi Digest #24: Royalty

My goodness, people, would you just look at Oshi?

That’s the last thing you see before you entire existence — physical, mental, emotional, spiritual — is shattered into infinitesimal shards. Fun! Continue reading

Hell to the Yes, STARMARIE

So … I missed the YouTube live. Or, rather, I caught a few minutes’ worth of the very beginning, when everybody was just sitting around and talking about the album and stuff. Did I miss anything good?

Like, did I miss this ass-kicker?

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Tomorrow, Watch STARMARIE’s YouTube Live

I’m not going to pretend to know what percentage of us tries to make the ungodly hourly difference between hemispheres work just to watch some streamed live or another, but I wanted to highlight this one because you should be learning to appreciate more idol stuff you guys! I think I even complained about that the last time I talked about STARMARIE.

In anticipation of their soon-to-drop new album (and I can only imagine that very intense new look), they’re streaming a live for FANTASY WORLD IV via YouTube:

Continue reading

This Is a Brief Post about Eri Kitamura’s New Single

Well, it’s not like there’s a ton else going on out there, and I want to hear some loud-ass music with possibly-idols on vocals, and I want it now. So! Remember Eri Kitamura? She’s got herself a single coming out tomorrow, and very helpfully dropped a teaser:

On the previous post, I was informed that Eri is a popular voice actor and not actually a gothic nun. Insert random joke about this being the true animetal then? Naw. (But for real, that’s some serious-ass animetal.)

I feel obligated to include additional something in this post, so: Continue reading

Better Three Months Late Than Never: Spooky Treat!

Man, does anybody else remember HATEGLEAM? For one extremely hot minute, I thought they represented a next step in loud idol evolution, a genuine metalcore kind of project fronted by a pair of maybe-idols. Their second main foray out into the world wasn’t quite up to the same (really good) standard, and the band never really seemed to catch on, and … then they were done. Exactly what the members were going to do with themselves at that point was a mystery, and frankly all of my thoughts were to other places.

And then a guy types the word “spooky” into a tweet and some odd recommendation, something that I’m allegedly following, comes up. Sure, let’s give this a try:

Oh neat, it’s (basically) HATEGLEAM! Except now going a rather Suzu Hinata-esque goth-rock-metal-like thing. Continue reading