The Corenament Is Coming. Help!

It’s that time of year again, people! The single largest, grandest, most incredibly stupid event on the Homicidols calendar is the Corenament, the annual rip-off celebration of the NCAA basketball tournament, which, just like the Corenament, will kick off next week. And in keeping with tradition, we’ll use the week before the Corenament to set the field.

The inaugural Corenament was a competition of best songs that was won (mostly legitimately!) by Kamen Joshi; last year’s more open format elevated Babymetal to the title, but not without some controversy that led directly into Queen of the Scene. This year, I wonder if we can’t bass-ackwardly stumble into a completely unexpected winner!

In that spirit, this year is going to take on a different hue; rather than go bonkers and have like 14 different pre-Corenament divisions, this year will have eight, and eight from each will advance to the Big Choreo, and seeding therein will be set by The Committee, the membership of which will be revealed on Selection Sunday (that’s Sunday) when the brackets come out.

Our job right now is to give The Committee an idea of how they should be building their respective brackets of 16, and we’re going to do that a little differently than in the past.

Rather than a whole mess of head-to-head match-ups that are glorified excuses to mess with people, I’m going back to the Homicidols archives for the most popular, most reacted-to and/or most jaw-slackening idols in the aforementioned eight divisions, and we’re going to have ourselves a little week-long winnowing process to get down to the top eight within each. That’s it! It’s pretty simple. Then The Committee will take our communal hard work and spit on it and do whatever they want instead, just like in real life!

The task before you is this: Between now and noonish Saturday, go through these divisions and, as if you’re a judge at a dog or cat or fancy rabbit show, select up to eight of those who you feel best represent what that division is. Can you select fewer than eight? You can! Can you select more than eight? You can try, but I’ll just discard your dang votes! The top 64 overall vote-getters will be placed before The Committee, and then the real fun begins.

Voting’s done! See you next week for the first rounds of the Corenament!

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