Adventures in Pour Lui’s YouTube Dungeon #5

Previously On Pour Lui’s YouTube Dungeon
With the help of her mum, Pour Lui successfully re-kidnaps her former prisoners, tries to poison Megumi, and the shocking revelation that she is actually a witch!

Episode 23: Brand New YouTube Shit

Puu becomes poo!

Puu becomes poo!
PUU BECOMES POO!
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
DO YOU GET IT?!

P̰̝̘Ù̡̱̭̲̖̻͎Ú̝͚̞̣̱ͅ ̛̗̟̗̫B̼͞͞E̛̲̱̳̖͈̯̯͘̕ͅC̴̦̥̤͔͇͚̤͟O͙̼͙̤̲̘͇̩ͅM̶̘̲̯͎̤̀E̼̬͜S͖͇͡ ҉͍̲͖̣͉͖̥P̼̺̤̥̯͚̖̥͞͝O͎͎̭̱̤͖̜O̡͓͇͘͝

Episode 24: Buzzing Mama

In this heartwarming Mother’s Day special, Pour Lui buys Mama Lui a vibrator, makes her brother watch and is consequently grounded until June 6.

Episode 25: Filler Episode

With Megumi having fled to the UK and Saki now on the rebound with Haruna Bacchiin, Pour Lui gathers the remaining prisoners to reminisce about that time she made a supervillain costume and fans meme’d her.

Episode 26: Happy Nonday

Pour Lui did not give Nozomi a massager for her birthday, despite what that unsubtle crotch shot at the beginning might have led you to believe. At least Puu doesn’t just have a box full of sex toys lying around in case she needs to give someone a present. At least there’s that.

Episode 27: Drone Warfare

What’s that noise?

Could it be? The demons have finally come to take the Pouverlord away!!!

Or it could just be a drone, but I like my idea better.

Will Pour Lui ever learn how to use a drone correctly? Or will she be dragged into hell first?
Will Michel receive a vibrator from Lui as a wedding gift?

To be continued? Yes!

Puu’s Youtube Rival Of The Week

Since a lot of idols are setting up their own YouTube dungeons, I thought I’d have a little feature highlighting what YouTube idols have been uploading recently. And in celebration of Pour Lui’s addition to Billie Idle, this week we’ve got former Billie Idle sweetheart Yasui Yuuhi (Now going by the identity Mahiruno Yuzuko) showing us how she does her makeup. Subscribe to her, she deserves it!

Idol Cannot Contain the Power of a BILLIE IDOL Plus Pour Lui, Which Is Real OMG

LUI is IDLE would be an amazing title for ths post, but it’s the opposite!

It turns out that the only thing that Pour Lui can’t do well is retire. Yes, friends, despite having tied up her BiS career twice now, and despite being old enough to be mother to most of RIOT BABY, Lui, idol GOAT and progenitor of most things loud and bloody and rude, is coming back … with BILLIE IDLE:

Oh, and there’s going to be a new album, whatevs

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Adventures in Pour Lui’s Youtube Dungeon #4

Previously On Pour Lui’s YouTube Dungeon
Everyone spent the entire week trapped in the Ototoy Dungeon until Tentenko finally let them go.
With Momoland out of the picture, Kamiya Saki has finally joined the chaos.

Episode 18: Mama Mia! Here We Go Again

The morning after the previous episode, Pour Lui wakes up, alone in her bedroom. Well, not completely alone.

“Get up you lazybones, it’s almost midday!”

“But muuuuum,” whines Pour Lui, rubbing her eyes. Did she just dream the entire Ototoy Dungeon arc? Where is everyone?

Mama Lui explains to her daughter that, while arguing with Megumi over the upcoming UK trip, everyone else just up and left, including Koshouji herself, leaving Pour Lui arguing with the wall until she eventually just passed out from ranting.

“Megumi told me where you were, so I signed her Dungeon Leave permission forms on your behalf. She’s a nice girl, that Megumi. Why don’t you join her idol group instead of sitting at home making these silly YouTube videos?”

Pour Lui was fuming. Everyone was gone! Who can she bully for YouTube views now? “Mum!” she demanded. “To the dungeon! I have a plan to get everyone back! But first, we need to make a supervillain costume!”

“Why don’t you get a real job?” Mama Lui sobbed.

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Adventures in Pour Lui’s Youtube Dungeon #3

Previously on Pour Lui’s Youtube Dungeon:
While trying to kidnap Jake Paul, Pour Lui and co. are lured into Tentenko’s Ototoy dungeon! Including Tentenko herself! Will they ever escape? I sure hope so, because Megumi is supposed to be going to the UK soon.

Episode 14: Cards Against Puumanity

It’s been three days since Pour Lui, Tentenko and Megumi got trapped in the Ototoy dungeon. All of a sudden, the door burst open! It’s Nozomi!

“I forgot my coat”
“Non, it’s been three days since you locked us in here, and only now are you coming back for your coat?”
“Yup.”

Another familiar face storms through the door; First Summer Uika.
“Yo Puu, Non-tan said you’d be here. Listen, do you have any of that orange-flavoured arsenic left, or did those two loser men drink it all?”

“HAHAHA, GOODBYE SUCKERS!”
Tentenko leaps up, and punches Nozomi right in the nose! The shock prompts Nozomi to drop the only key, which Tenko swiftly grabs and runs away, locking the other four inside! Again!

After a brief stunned silence, Nozomi eventually chimes, “So, question. Does anybody even bother, you know, just trying to escape? Or are you all seriously so lazy that you’d rather just sit here and slowly starve to death than actually try to make the effort of running when this shit happens?”
Pour Lui ponders Nozomi’s question for a moment, eyes glazed over in deep thought. After a few seconds of quiet, she calmly states “let’s play a card game”. The other three groan in exasperation.

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Kerrie’s Adventures in Pour Lui’s Youtube Dungeon #1

How do I introduce someone who really doesn’t need an introduction? Not just because she’s one of the biggest forebears of the alt-idol movement, but also because, well, we’ve covered her on this site so many times that is there really any point?

Anyway, you all know by now that Pour Lui has been luring her merry band of ex-BiS groupmates into her YouTube dungeon to make videos, and Maniac said “Oi Kerrie, write about this!” and I said “But I’m boring and I don’t even understand Japanese!” and he said “Make it work or else I’m revoking your Watanabe meme privileges” and I was like “Ok, I guess I can just watch it and blindly guess what’s happening”

So presenting, this past week (and a bit) in BYS!

Episode 1: April Fool

Haha, nice one Puu, all your jokes about being a Youtuber after graduating and you finally did it, on April Fools day, of course. Let’s watch this then. I see she found the crying baby sound effects. And MS Paint! Wait, what the hell?? Is she okay? Has she been kidnapped? Is she in someone’s basement? Shouldn’t this be on the deep web? Is that Megumi? And Uipon! Oh my goodness, all of Final-era BiS (minus Saki, who was probably taking Momoland to the movies or something) are enacting their revenge!

Episode 2: Pero Pero Chew Chew

Wait, you mean that wasn’t an April Fools prank? Also Puu learns how to make YouTube Poops. Or YouTube Puu-ps. 

Episode 3: Go To Cola

The BiS OG (still no Saki, who was now in line to buy Momoland the Happy Meal she promised) escaped the YouTube Dungeon and have fled to the woods. Alas, Pour Lui was well aware of their ill-fated escape plans and chased them down with cola bottles screaming “Unless one of you finds a dead body I can exploit, you’re not going anywhere!” and forced them to become living cola fountains while Nozomi asked questions!

Episode 4: Rubberband Girl

With the fates of the other three girls left uncertain, Pour Lui dragged Megumi back to the dungeon and prompted her with a cunning, Saw-esque puzzle; “If you escape the grasp of my rubberband trap, I’ll let you go.” Because Puu isn’t a complete sadist, she also gets in on the action. She would soon regret that decision.

Episode 5: Let’s Bitchy!

First Summer Uika, suffering from a devastating case of Stockholm Syndrome, joins the side of her former captor and schemes their next cunning plan; to become total bitches. Whether that means the Regina George kind of bitch or the apparent Japanese interpretation of “bitchy” (aka “Too Hot For TV”) is uncertain. After all, with Pour Lui’s gaggle, it could go either way.

Episode 6: The Bitch Awakens

Puu and Uipon, or “Team Bitchy” as they will be known onwards, enlist another former captive, Michibayashi Rio, onto their team, as they hatch their first dirty deed; to seduce their YouTube rivals the Charisma Brothers and feast on the poor men like mermaids!

Episode 6.5: Their Story

A special side-episode featured on the Charisma Brothers’ channel, a more in-depth analysis of the Team Bitchy seduction plan, featuring drinking games and romance?

Episode 7: Blue Hair Don’t Care

Megumi is still being held captive inside the dungeon (and dyed her hair off-screen), where Pour Lui forces her to listen to the official BYS theme song.

Episode 8: Banana Fish

Pour Lui attempts to eat a banana while re-enacting the album art for McFly’s Motion In The Ocean.

To Be Continued…

And that’s it for this week (and a half) of the BYS Youtube Channel!

Will Megumi ever escape the dungeon? Will Saki get a second date with Momoland? What exactly do they mean by “bitchy”? Find out next week! Or you could just go down the sensible route and subscribe.

Don’t subscribe to this guy’s YouTube though.

I’m Not Crying, You’re Crying

Man.

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Pull No Punches with This Friday Fun

I’m sorry? I can’t hear you over the sound of my own screaming in anticipation of the biggest party in the UK.


Well, that’s one thing I’m definitely looking forward to, but you know what I’m not looking forward to? Continue reading

The New Future for BiS Is Terrifying and Confusing, Video Confirms

Guess what? I definitely wasn’t ready for what BiS was going to look like sans the Progenitor of Progenitors (Pour Lui, you goofs), nor for a whole mess of other things, and definitely not at 7:00 a.m. But hey, the “WHOLE LOTTA LOVE” MV has arrived and, aside from confirming that is has nothing to do with Zeppelin, it threw me for a whole writhing cascade of loops:

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BiS’s Farewell to Pour Lui Is Available for Free

It’s time to start to say goodbye, apparently. BiS has placed both tracks from their re-major debut and final single with their founder, the grandest dame of them all and likely part of the string-pulling machinery at WACK, Pour Lui, out into the world for completely free listens:

Let’s listen to it! Continue reading

Pour One Out for Her; The GOAT Finally Retires

I’d go ahead and blame Kerrie here, but the poor child has been so inundated with graduations lately that I don’t want to pile on and, in fact, this is the kind of development that does in fact suck but at least has the right reasons behind it. And we get to see if the greatest conspiracy of all is more true than we ever could have reckoned!

Natalie.mu has the in-depth goods, too. The very short version: With the major label release of “WHOLE LOTTA LOVE” (yes), she realized that she doesn’t need BiS and BiS doesn’t need her, and it’s time to move on. And so, at the tour final (March 4), when Saki and Aya’s trade was set to be reversed anyway, Lui will graduate. Continue reading