New Month, New Music from Minna no Kodomochan

I love this! The first of the month used to just mean handing over my rent check and making sure all the utilities got paid. These days, it also brings a new song from Minna no Kodomochan, one of the most musically adventurous chika idols who just happen to be hitting everything out the park recently.

You can get the song from other outlets here: https://t.co/MCpbeZzVOH

“Soliloquies” is Kodomochan’s attempt at a light, breezy summer song with acoustic guitar strumming and popcorn keyboards.  Of course, it is Kodomochan and quickly evolves into frenetic dissonance, but it never loses any of its warm charm. Continue reading

Minna no Kodomo-chan Kicks off Summer with an Inexplicable Home Movie

I knew there was a reason to get out of bed today!

I don’t know if 2019, for idol, can truly be salvaged. After the huge run of beloved personalities and groups hanging it up just in the first quarter and a sudden paucity of particularly great releases, here we stand at the unofficial gateway to summer needing some kind of savior. Might we remember the year for the two BiSH EPs-turned-album? What about NECRONOMIDOL’s upcoming record? Or maybe something out of left field, yet to come?

Or maybe what two-time Corenament champions Minna no Kodomo-chan, who got me so very eager to see what they were going to be able to do with five straight months of new music when they … announced that that they were releasing five straight months of new music. Have mercy. You’d think that idols who consistently dominate the international popularity contests epic athletic contests annual contests that I definitely don’t rig Corenament would have just this enormous battery of digitized content for we humble gaijin fans to embrace, but it’s just not true — the best way to describe MV releases from the Children is “semi-annual.” (Or at least that’s the case for their history so far!) Rather, as we learned with “The Walls” a couple of weeks ago, they hold those cards close so as to unleash their full power at opportune and always impressive moments.

So this string was going to be special, you know? With five months of fresh material in the offing, it’s reasonable to hope that at least one track would get video treatment. And, brother, that hope was not in vain, though you may lose all hope by the time you reach the end:

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Minna no Kodomochan Launch Five Months of New Music with “wall”

Kodomochan, fresh off of their back-to-back Corenement championships, has released the first deliverable of their recently successful crowdfunding campaign. As promised, from now until September, Everyone’s Children will bless us with a new song each and every month.  

May’s entry is the minimalistically titled continuation on the group’s core theme: “wall”

“What potent blood hath modest May.” ― Ralph W. Emerson

The doom metal pacing is is a perfect set-up that drives right into a synth-pop transition to… more metal. It’s like Iron Maiden invited Flock of Seagulls over to jam (think “I Ran” meets “Run to the Hills”).  Like many Kodomochan songs, it contains a glorious aural revelation that is worth staying around for before devolving into a reckless and manic finish including one last metal drop. Continue reading

Congratulations to Our Back-to-back Corenament Champions Minna no Kodomo-chan; Woe Be unto Those Sinister Forces Arrayed Against Them

From the Galaxy Note of Wilton P. Prescott Jr.

April 8, 2019

I’m still wrestling with what I just witnessed. I’ve been to every Corenament final since the inception — saw Kamen Joshi’s loaded audience in ’16, the BiSH-Babymetal staredown in ’17, Minna no Kodomo-chan’s supernaturally aided victory last year — and never once have I felt as awed, in the presence of greatness, as I do at this moment.

Like every year, I came for NECRONOMIDOL. Like every year, I watched them bow out early.

Like every year, I thought that PassCode might break through. Like every year, they were dropped by a lesser name.

Like every year, I had money riding on the outcome. I put it on YONEKO after her big second-round upset. Like every year, I leave the Corenament final a little bit poorer.

Like every year, I came because I expected to see greatness emerge. And this year, I finally truly saw it.

What Minna no Kodomo-chan accomplished in this run is not only historic, not only unprecedented; it’s almost unfathomable. To run that gauntlet once and emerge as champion in an event in which anything can happen, that’s reasonable, no matter how shocking the outcome. But to do it twice, and consecutively? I think people are still in shock.

Yes, from what I could tell, the sentimental favorite this time around was YONEKO. And she put up a good fight. But it was clear right from the tip that this was a one-sided affair, that the only thing keeping the outcome even remotely interesting was that dog-bitten girl’s incredible spirit and the sense from Kodomo-chan that they should keep it interesting.

Honestly, they made it look easy. And isn’t that what they always say? That that’s what the great ones do? They were toying with her out there. I’ve been to Super Bowls. World Cup finals. Seen the Stanley Cup hoisted on home and away ice. Even was in attendance for the Royal Rumble. And at no point in any of that did I see a performance this dominant with the stakes this high.

And of course there were the whispers, and those whispers only got louder as the evening wore on: That Necroma was screwed by a bad call; that Kaqriyo should’ve made it far enough for a rematch; that YONEKO benefited from some inexplicable home cooking to make it so far; that Hanako-san’s cryptic post-match remarks after being eliminated suggested that some kind of fix was in. To all of those conspiracy theorists, I say, feh. This might not have been the outcome that we wanted, but it’s the outcome that we got, and Minna no Kodomo-chan earned every inch of it.

Twice champions, Minna no Kodomo-chan have done something that previously seemed impossible — they proved the long-term loyalty of the hearts of idol wota, and they showed that pure creative power truly can be rewarded.

Tony, this is going to need some edits before it’s ready for press. How’s the angle? Does it need more on the match itself? I’m going to hit this little bar down the street — looks like it’s still open. Talk to you in the morning.


EXT. Central Minneapolis – Night

While a few DRUNK VIRGINIA FANS still mill about the streets, it’s otherwise quiet and still on this chilly early spring evening. A tiny WOMAN in a nun’s habit — SISTER JEAN — sits patiently on a bench.

An equally tiny FIGURE, all in red — HANAKO-SAN — appears next to her from thin air!

SISTER JEAN: So it’s done then.

HANAKO-SAN: It’s done. I think we made our point.

SISTER JEAN: It’s still very noble of you.

HANAKO-SAN: Noble … How can it be noble when my motivations are so evil?

SISTER JEAN: Evil is in the eye of the beholder, my child, and you are compelled by forces greater than yourself.

HANAKO-SAN: Still though. I have to hurt people I love.

SISTER JEAN: So do we all in this great game. (beat) Are all things prepared for the next step?

HANAKO-SAN: I’ll be announcing the damned record this week, so yes.

SISTER JEAN: Good. You will be acquiring hundreds of souls to back us.

HANAKO-SAN: And still can’t save my own.

SISTER JEAN: Patience, dear, patience. I have spoken with the Great Old Ones. Our task is nearly complete. Deliverance will be ours.


INT. BIKER BAR – NIGHT

Despite appearances, tonight this bar has been given over to a different sort of conclave, this of IDOLS. Dozens of figures great and small are CIRCLED UP. The air is SMOKY.

MINAMI NAO: I don’t know about the rest of you, but I’ve had about enough.

JUNNOSUKE WATANABE: It’s rigged. I’d know, I’ve been trying to rig it myself for years, and I keep getting out-rigged.

RICKY WILSON: Well, maybe if you’d start to play it fair like we do, we’d all have better luck.

SOZELICA: Oh please. You’re just saying that because you lost Sari.

KiKA FRONT FRONTALE: We all lost Sari.

MILCBOY: Shut up, all of you. We were supposed to have corrected for this failure after last year.

2&: Right. There was a plan.

RICKY WILSON: Oh, spare me your plans. Everybody here knows that we needed Sari as Queen of the Scene to rally enough power to stop whatever keeps these girls in control of whatever they want to control. You ruined that.

2&: And you sicced your hair monster on me in retaliation. Real smart, ace.

YONEKO: Please stop. This isn’t the way.

MILCBOY: No, it isn’t. The way would have been for you to actually show up and make a challenge of it. That was a disgrace.

(YONEKO BLUSHES)

MILCBOY: This can’t go on. We need another solution.

NADESHIKO: But what solution? Whatever’s backing them is like nothing I can imagine.

RICKY WILSON: It’s the Great Old Ones, I swear it. This is retaliation.

MILCBOY: Well, whatever it is, it needs something just as powerful to fight it. We face a turning point in history, friends. BiS is dead. Chika idol is big business. “Alt” has lost all meaning. All that’s left is history. How we tell the story of how we all came to be, how our world came to be, and who gets to be remembered for it. Things like tonight? We are all at risk if these ragged little upstarts can take it all away so easily.

WATANABE: So what then?

MILCBOY: The Great Old Ones aren’t the only things in the world with power. I had an idea while catching up on Game of Thrones — Westeros was safe from the White Walkers as long as the Wall stood.

BENI: But then the Night King got one of Dany’s dragons and blasted it down!

MILCBOY: Very astute. Yes, for all the power of our numbers, there’s an obstacle in our way. The only way that we can win the war is for us to turn one of the most powerful forces in the world to our side of the fight.

A young woman, all TWIN TAILS and CHEEKS and black and red BODY ARMOR, steps slowly from behind the bar.

YUIMETAL: Did you miss me?

STAY TUNED FOR QUEEN OF THE SCENE III: YUI’S REVENGE, COMING THIS JULY FROM HOMICIDOLS DOT COM!

A Year This Chaotic Deserves a Corenament Final This Unexpected

Well dang, you guys. Tell me if you saw this coming: Minna no Kodomo-chan not only making a return to the Corenament final, but absolute dismantling every opponent foolish enough to step into their path along the way; opposite them, the little weirdo that could, a giantslayer if ever there was one in this event, former dog bite victim and Homicidols Dot Com interview subject YONEKO. I usually have a low-key private rooting interest when we do these things (and am often disappoint!), but this time I find myself in the position of an over-proud parent. Hell, I’ve been that way through the entire Final Four!

This one’s for all the marbles*, gang. A culmination of victories large and small can only be a perfect synthesis. New-school loud idols against an established performer doing new things, the defending champs against a sentimental upstart. It’s poetry, I tell you. Now let’s settle it for good and all: Continue reading

The Corenament Final Four Has Arrived. Hold on to Your Butts.

Well, team, we made it. As promised, today begins the Final Four, and what a final four it is — favorites and underdogs and dark horses and other metaphors all meeting to decide who this year’s Corenament champion will be. And we haven’t even had any fanfic yet! Amazing. We truly do live in wild times.

The bracket, as it now stands:

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Kodomochan’s Crowdfunding Success Means We all Win

With a strong closing week to their Campfire campaign, 2018 Corenament defending champion Minna no Kodomochan hit 100% of their all-or-nothing fundraising goal with just two-and-a-half days to go.  This means that Everyone’s Children will now bless us all with a new song for each of the next five months and follow that up with a 15-date, Japan-wide tour. 

They immediately celebrated their campaign’s success by releasing a dance MV for “Shoujo A”.

Is this donation tax deductible?

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Let’s Reset With Something Nice and Loud

Let us clear ourselves, emotionally and spiritually, after the horrific purge that was yesterday; those who’ve taken to referring to it as Black Monday certainly have the right of it.

Good thing for us that there are still plenty of idols out there, many of whom do good and cool things that are worthy of being held up as whatever you need to recover, even for a bit. For instance, what of last year’s Corenament winner, Minna no Kodomo-chan, who managed to make a ton of Best Of 2018 noise without taking home any awards? Honoka and Cinnamon are still kicking out there, and they’re still the front of loud and chaotic music, and their performances are still, well, kind of inexplicable:

Soothing

Fully recognizing that the back panels make choreography even on a big, open stage a challenge, can you imagine trying to do much more than what they already do on a space that large, with a band around to boot? Hence it really is all about the sound — well, the sound and the inexplicable image of those two girls with those things on their backs kind of turning and twirling and tilting and stuff — and letting their one-of-a-kind music win out when you need it.

We took some hits yesterday, friends. Old favorites are gone, and there’s chaos surrounding what we once felt so certain about. As you can see, there are in fact ways left to us to move on.

Kodomo-chan Goes Crowdfunding Again

So I got a little irrationally excited when 2018 Corenament winners Minna No Kodomo-chan announced that they would be launching a new and “very important” crowdfunding project. I mean, the product of Kodomo-chan’s last crowdfunding campaign was their Album of the Year-nominated World Without Walls and a promise to fly to one fan’s house anywhere in the world to perform a live, personal concert.

While we await the announcement of whether or not our living rooms will be blessed by the presence of Honoka, Cinnamon and their hyper math-punk and doom metal drops, the objectives of their second crowdfunding campaign have now been announced.

This time, if they meet their goal, Everyone’s Children will release one new song per month for five months starting in April 2018. Then, after the release of the fifth song in August, they will embark on a nation-wide tour (“Japan” being the nation; since Oyasumi Hologram crowdfunded their U.S. tour, I guess we need to be specific). Continue reading

I Don’t Think Minna no Kodomo-chan Can Tone It Down, You Guys

Just last night, I was getting a meal with a younger friend, and the barely audible radio took up a familiar melody. I needed a second to place it, but only a second, and was soon bouncing along and enthusiastically adding my own “Mmmbop, ba duba dop” along with the iconic tween band. The response was an eyeroll, which led to a discussion in which I copped to always loving the crap out of stupid Hanson despite “being a proper young edgelord and always pretending like I was too cool for that.” This in turn spawned a conversation about what constitutes and edgelord, and at what age it officially becomes not okay to pose as one, and whether edgelords or scene kids or hipsters are worse, and anyway this anecdote is taking on a life of its own.

The point is, what I wanted to drive home to my friend is that edgelords, for good or ill, can easily be spotted by their complete and utter refusal to operate under any speed other than full, and their expectation that others do the same. It can, frankly, be refreshingly honest and committed behavior, with candid dialogue between trusted peers provided means by which we grow and change as necessary. It can also be completely obnoxious!

Now, see: title, and come back to me and ask aloud whether you think that I’m attempting to call out Minna no Kodomo-chan, winners of the Corenament and big 2018 breakouts. Go ahead! I don’t bite. Okay, great question, and no, not really. The principle, I think, does apply, because while I could not possibly be more excited about a new single coming out in less time than it’s going to take me to overreact to the news, let’s regard the whole thing and then see where it takes us. Continue reading